I have a small (ish, only around 300!) collection of laserdiscs. Laserdiscs were the DVD equivalent of the late-80s and early-90s: the premium alternative to VHS’ budget leader. They are heavy, unwieldy, and shiny: giant two-sided compact discs the size of LP records glued together in the middle. Circumstances have led me to slowly sell off the collection (among other things, a local record store wanted $5 for a Japanese copy of Robocop 2!), but I’ve been whittling away at it for so long all that’s left are movies I’m really not that interested in watching. Let’s purge them together!
Ironic we should talk about obsolete formats when Disney’s animated Aladdin is about as outdated as John Shaft. What stood as an instrument in Robin William’s bid for cinematic domination is just another beloved Disney “classic”: one that my generation remembers fondly from our clam shell copies. I have re-watched a chunk of these lately and none of them hold up for me: maybe their formulaic nature is what gets my ire. Yes, these were revolutionary, but as I’ve proven to myself before the world then is different from the world now and age and era are as didactic to media as plot and character. What struck me most was the ancient CGI: the Cave of Wonders; the magic carpet texture-wrapping; and some shots in the finale. Only one Disney CGI animator is credited! For a company that lists hundreds of VFX staff for a Marvel production now, it’s humbling then, what the prospect of computer effects could have meant to them. It would take Toy Story three years later to replace that fog with dollar signs.
The Return of Jafar is a far-simpler beast. It looks like a Saturday morning TV pilot with a paper-thin plot that barely runs over an hour. Robin Williams is replaced by Dan Castellaneta and Genie is retooled to be as obnoxious as possible so you don’t notice that he sounds like Homer. And Iago the parrot gets a major plot arc and even sings a couple of his own songs (at least Gilbert Gottfried came back, said no one ever). When marathoned with the original the sequel obviously pales in comparison. However there really isn’t anything wrong with it. Even the animation is as good, aside from being a little dark with an overall lack-of-depth. You can tell the difference between a ‘blockbuster’ Disney film and its assembly line in the contrasts and shadows. Otherwise it’s fine. What else do you want me to say? It’s the Godfather Part III of Disney sequels.
The Aladdin series was a modern test to see if Disney’s blockbuster formula could carry over to the small screen, and it sparked a billion-dollar direct-to-video industry. Now, more then 25-years-later, they are hoping to get more of your money with the obligatory live-action remake for contemporary audiences. I am a little more ready to watch it now.
//jf 6.30.19
theory of a daskeman 