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A micro-story for mature readers.


i spot her immediately the only girl in the class with that effervescent copper hair shoulder length freshly washed and naturally curly the longest strands running like water down to her, black v neck sweater form fitting i can see her breasts surge forth then end in their b cup abruptness and i think of how larger, fuller they would be when her nipples are hard she must have caught me staring by now but i cant help myself i am lost in my own fantasy, if not her i think of anyone else around me following my eye line to whatever, whoever can catch my attention. thats when i snap out of it not because i am embarrassed but because as soon as she walked in i knew she was mine i could feel, the skin around her hips clutching tightly to every curve how my hands make the tiny blond hairs on her waistline stand on end like stalactites i had already explored her, exploited her riches, our future was my present. and all of my confidence surges to my temples and i feel focused and rich with the possibilities, then the headache. the migraine begins again.


maybe you should learn to drive

A poem.


whisk me away.
strip me
blind me
bind me down
fill my cold heart with sound.
a future promised is warmth abound.

string me up and wash me.
let the water caress me
kicking and screaming
teething
fear of awesome believing.
im still in this pram,
this darkened cab.
the van parks out back.

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in memory of gregory hoblitt

A short story for mature readers.

“A celebration-of-life for a departed friend turns into a public spectacle.”

everyone hello, and good evening! i hope you are enjoying yourselves at my expense! for those who dont know, i am paul! yes, yes your applause pleases me greatly. thank you. once a year we open the manor to our closest friends in celebration! celebration of another year! another school year! another year of steves bald head so fucking shiny it looks like his moms waxed asshole! another year just to say we made it. we call this the long night! thank you, thank you, but remember this was a team effort. so from the bottom of my heart i want to thank each and every one of you, newbies included, for making the last four years devoid of any police intervention! as you all know i am not one to pass off an opportunity to get everyones attention and less likely to give it away once ive got it, so as you can see our good friend andrew is going around the room handing out shot glasses, you will want to keep those and a shot of warrens dads everclear brought to you in a stylish, glass gallon jug, just let me know when everyones set up. good? ok first a toast to the long night, to four successful years and, i hope whoever lives here in september can find their own thing because this night is ours! to the night!

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Capsule Reviews Vol.2


capsule review 2

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

BLLLAAAACCCKKOOouughhhh couuuffffff  huuuuuuuuHHHHHHHHH AAHHHHHooooooOOOOO HOOOOO HOOOOO HUUUUUUUHhhhhhhhhhhhh!

[I have seen Holy Grail more times cumulatively then possibly any other movie ever. It’s not really that funny anymore and it’s dated HORRIBLY (just look at that camera focusing), but it holds a special place in my heart after seeing clips of its most famous scenes in various places over the years as well as sitting through the whole thing a few times (just a few?); AND beating the PC game, which is TOP-loaded with clips. I’ve seen it so many times that I was able to notice the narration was different in the Flashback screening I went to at Cineplex, which sounded like they used a different take of Michael Palin during the storybook sequences (but didn’t have him come back in and rerecord it at 80-years-old, for example). This could have been because a remaster of the original audio track was impossible (I have seen the movie in mono many times) but there was no mention of a remaster on the posters or in the film itself so it was jarring hearing inflections I wasn’t used to. I liken it to hearing a popular song and then finding out it wasn’t the first version they recorded: even a classic takes more then one try.]

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