Dub’s Take: Madame Web

A spoiler-free mini movie review.


“Madame Web” is way more watchable than what has been suggested. Omitting the lack of hype, subdued marketing, and languorous comments from its lead star, the movie is mindless, low-impact entertainment, thankfully devoid of any Marvel movie baggage, and anchored by a solid leading lady who has nothing to be ashamed of.

To casual viewers, director SJ Clarkson – a TV veteran whom this is their first major feature – may seem like they’re playing the filmmaking side of things too safe, but I found the frame mercifully non-convoluted with the excess texture that drags most modern superhero movies down for me. In place of your effects-laden Marvel “extravaganza”, Madame Web’s shot structure & editing suggest themes of time & perspective in a refreshingly grounded, fluid, Mike Figgis-esque way (except perhaps including more single CCTV shots). All I was really left wanting was less cutting to the reaction, rather than letting the movement breathe, in the action scenes.

The obvious difference of opinion will be over Dakota Johnson’s insouciant performance. In the Cineplex pre-show, she says she took the role because she was interested in the idea of a woman “whose superpower is her mind.” Johnson’s last big gig was the “Fifty Shades” trilogy, and Cassandra Webb is another empowering role ripe for a feminist performer to tackle. Here, with her strong, self-sufficient interpretation – and looking good with her long, dark hair, red leather jacket, and Levis – Johnson is poised to become some little girl’s role model and a pre-pubescent male comic book film fan’s first female fantasy.

The film is nimbly paced and ends at the perfect point, except perhaps by five minutes, with an epilogue that eludes logic. Sony’s live-action Spider-verse expansion might not happen if Madame Web doesn’t gain more traction through streaming, but the climax isn’t clear enough to foreshadow everything the film throws at us visually in that final scene. It looks ridiculous, but is probably comic-book accurate.

4 out of 5

Poster sourced from impawards.com. What do you think? Was Johnson the right casting choice, or did Cassie need to be played by someone with more range? What about Emma Roberts? Considering her minor supporting role here, does an alternate timeline exist where Roberts & Johnson switch characters? Or are you one of the millions on the bandwagon ragging on the poor movie at the moment and you think I must have some ulterior motive for a positive review? Let me know in the comments below!

small talk

A poem.


i can have more
fulfilling conversations
than i ever could
with you
or anyone else
in my head.

sorry.


i can debate me all i want –
fly my freak flag as i ought;
like what i like
and own what i wrought –
without another being judging
whether this connection needs to be dropped.

it’s probably not you

but i hold these truths to be self-proven
over decades of believing i was being suffused
by the bullies & vicarious lifers
we share space with on this moon –
i’m a White guy from Canada,
i know nothing of misuse:
only a sheltered upbringing i use as my excuse
for thirty years of reservations
in feeling removed.

Continue reading

Dub’s Take: Argylle

A spoiler-free mini movie review.


In an age of debating whether movie studios like Warner have the moral right to destroy unreleased films like their “Coyote vs. Acme” and “Batgirl”, here we have “Argylle”: a movie that didn’t need to be made at all.

Director Matthew Vaughn also helmed all three “Kingsman” movies. Both Kingsman 1 & 3 (“The King’s Man”) were fun and non-conformist, with well-textured characters and believable dialogue that injected some juj into their otherwise-boilerplate spy-caper stories. And where Kingsman 1 leaned towards comedy, Kingsman 3 was effectively dramatic. The reason that absurdist humour in Kingsman 1 and those unexpected tragic beats in 3 worked so well was because the movies were good and had earned your disbelief.

Vaughn is obviously capable, so it’s perplexing that Argylle inspires no audience empathy. Its narrative coalescence is predictable & uninspired. Its special effects are functionally on the level of a television pilot. The all-star cast – from Sam Rockwell to Bryan Cranston to Catherine O’Hara – does exactly what you expect them to with neither subtlety nor relish. And, no surprise, it’s too long, with a final third that introduces an assembly line of misdirection that ends with a dance number, all of which plays like it was written during an endless night of bong tokes.

It is these workmanlike qualities that suggest everyone on Argylle was just doing it for the money: it’s exactly what you expect and nothing more. Vaughn made an inoffensive “Kingsman for Girls”, which will serve its purpose as disposable entertainment for its audience and as a tax write off for its executives. The actors knew that no one was winning any awards: they all showed up with their lines memorized (we hope), did their job, and went home. You will guess all the twists. Your partner will laugh at the cat. And there’s so much leg n’ boob from Bryce Howard & Dua Lipa that you can see what they had for breakfast.

1.5 out of 5

Poster sourced from impawards.com. What do you think? Did this review come across a little too “Red Letter Media”? Where was the cat’s gas mask in the finale? Is that like the “lorem ipsum” being left in the “Last of Us Part 2” PS5 remaster? Do you feel that there is a lack of attention-to-detail in these contemporary corporate-led media releases when there needs to be more scrutiny? Do you see that box below? Leave a comment!

on my knees

(digging for cheese)

A poem.


some days,
most without even trying,
i take the easy way out:

i get stuck in my thoughts
and spin out of control
not even paying attention

and soon i’m on my knees in the kitchen
hunched over
trying to differentiate between months-old droppings
and fragments of plastic cheese
from the bag of Tex-Mex i just dropped on the floor

because i would rather simply be
trying to do nothing at all just
laying on the couch but
thinking,
dreaming,
praying of being somewhere else,
anywhere,
in another dimension, off there somewhere
where exists what could have happened –

Continue reading

that one curmudgeonly leaf

A poem.


i’ll have the news on to catch the top stories
but after a few minutes it’s purposeless –
they’re all the same bullet points from yesterday
through a perspection of passing time:

some people died
and one famous about to;
displaced persons from a camp removal;
one’s a terrorist about to be tried;
another one biding to be penalized;
global warming at an all-time high;
random attacks on the rise;
car pile-up on the ninety-nine…

by then all i feel is empty inside:
it sounds like a Saturday night of gaming
than a generation’s place in humankind.
i put a CD i’ve heard a thousand times in the drive
that doesn’t come standard with new models of that type,
because i’d rather hear Morrissey whine
than to face my own materiality of being alive.

when my world ends,
i don’t want it to be from a shot to the head
or an environment that kills me in earnestness
or even just peacefully laying in bed:

Continue reading