i think we have a winner on our hands!
finally,
after years of searching,
someone is willing to take their clothes off to be in my movie!
“i’m thrilled to introduce
the only one of us that i’m paying
to be a part of this voluntary production i’m arranging!”
what do you want for dinner tonight?
kobe beef?
i’m buying.
the rest of them, give ’em ramen with egg!
now stroke, stroke, stroke for Sadie Benning’s sake!
THE SCENE
A suburban park surrounding a lake, during a mild day in early-Spring. Present Day.
THE CAST
A Man, 60s, spending his day fishing.
A Girl, under 10, who happens upon him.
Her Mom, late-20s/early-30s, her guardian.
*
LIGHTS UP. A MAN stands alone off to stage-left, facing away from the audience, casting off with an imaginary fishing rod. There are sounds of a public park: birds; wind; and the resting of water. There is a bench beside the man and on top rests his backpack, a cooler, and some other miscellaneous items: he is set up to be standing there for the day.
ENTER a little GIRL, clad in a one-piece rainsuit, jumping on-stage from stage-right into imaginary puddles with her yellow boots. Her MOM follows her. The girl is singing a little song.
MOM
Honey, don’t go off too far!
GIRL
I won’t!
The girl circles back to Mom. Near her, the girl falls on her bum. Mom helps her up.
MOM
Good thing we bought you this rainsuit!
GIRL
Mom, I’m going to be all wet!
MOM
You won’t. It’ll be like magic.
Stand here a second. Watch that man.
They watch the fisherman.
Continue reading
what is it exactly, inside of me
that makes me want to impregnate every girl that i see?
“some male bullshit” – i hear your decree,
but what makes a woman fill up a jar with her own pee?
the olive-coloured pant tells all.
even Justin Bieber can’t refute a rebuke
to this single truth
although you might catch him being proud –
especially the times when Hailey is around.
Those Baldwins are known to run afoul.
every nerve, every tendon –
enough visual information
to make a guy think he’s got you pegged.
a lighter-hued pant makes us less well-behaved
in public
while we stare at everything below the waist
that we can save for later in your wake
of our own partner’s haste.
theory of a daskeman 