nostalgia’s in atm

ou, une merde chaude par une journée froide

A poem.


her back is to the separating wall,
left thigh over right
under the table at the unhappily married
middle-aged debutante ball,

long faces and all,
and instead of a trombone in her lap it’s her phone
and i’m not leering from around a beam.
this time.


what’s the use of this personification
except to hold on to it for later?
drooling through my pillow case at the open mystery
under those Lululemon Kirkland Signature duperies,
clasping fruitlessly to post-workout legs
like plastic cheese bricks to hot broccoli reeds


that, again, no one’s forcing me to eat

and being fun & flirty and platonic won’t do us good either
because you’re another non-native English speaker,
and i’ve changed little carnally in twenty-five years.
i’d much rather just non-verbally roll around on the floor
but it isn’t my middle-school Québec exchange anymore.
it’s life.



it’s life.
but apparently nostalgia’s all in at the mome.


Featured image “Impression of ‘Lonely woman embracing body in morning’ by Alena Shekhovtcova” illustrated by the author.

being the beta man

A poem.


when i’m on the clock,

i’ll talk back to a manager
no problem,
if i think it’ll get me anywhere

or not in trouble
or teased by female staff


but i won’t tell the guy
sitting in my reserved seat at the
movie theatre to
move over
please.

some words are too much trouble
for too little reward,
save my father and i getting
what we paid for.

he won’t say anything either.


Original photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com.

Dub’s Take: Sarah’s Oil (2025)

or, “The Next Hundredth Go-Around:
400 Words on Zachary Levi”:
A spoiler-free mini movie conversation.


“Coyness is nice,
and coyness can stop you
From doing all the things in life that you want to,

So if there’s something you’d like to try…
Ask me, I won’t say no, how could I?
Because if it’s not love,
then it’s the bomb that will bring us together.”

– “Ask” by Morrissey & The Smiths

[cont’d]

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Dub’s Take: Mother’s Day (2010)

or, “Bullshit-Free: 400 Words on
Patrick John Flueger”:
A spoiler-free mini movie conversation.


In my previous post, I wrote that certain scenes of movie violence only register viscerally with audiences, opposed to emotionally, were it not for the “mettle” of the participating actors.

As Devyn LaBella’s “Horizon 2” lawsuit illustrates, professionally-minded directors – not including the “Costner Factor”won’t force challenging material on the unprepared: potentials read a script; sign an agreement; and, afterward, may require healthy decompression.

But what about actors in the television industry? How do serial players on today’s gritty cop shows compartmentalize 15-hour workdays filled with repeat coverage of the world’s worst? Other than with a good cry?

Deadline recently disclosed that TV alumnus Patrick John Flueger (Shawn on the original “4400”; Ruzek on “Chicago PD”) would be taking a leave of absence from PD, possibly due to “an instance of alcohol… on set.” With PD’s frequently off-putting subject matter, I joked with my spouse that the guy must have finally broke.

[cont’d]

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Dub’s Take: Once Upon a Time in America (1984)

or, “Deborah’s Theme:
400 Words on Elizabeth McGovern”:
A spoiler-ish mini
movie conversation.


The following post discusses taboo
themes, and contains language that
could be triggering.

I’m late to the “Downton Abbey” party, so I wasn’t aware (or spoiled) that one of season 4’s serials stems from the sexual assault of a major character.

This event – stupefying though off-screen – is earned narratively, by virtue of my invested connection with the players. Original properties usually have to really convince me that their using rape, implied or otherwise, isn’t either for shock value, or out of creative laxity.

Having said that, if an intrepid & shameless (mostly shameless) Reddit user hasn’t already asked what ‘The Most Disturbing Rape Scenes of All-Time’ are, I have now walked into that trap myself.

I have my own personal picks that needn’t be discussed here, but the potency of said scenes would be dissonant were it not for the mettle of the actors involved: particularly those who may not already have a propensity towards violence.

[cont’d]

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